It’s not until those moments that I don’t skate that I realize how skateboarding has taken over my entire life, really, it’s all I actually do. I’ve been so immersed in this world to the point of no escape. Sometimes it feels like there really is nothing else, nothing else I’d rather be doing. Sometimes I think that it isn’t healthy, how much of my life is centered around skateboarding, but then I realize that I’d rather have something to obsess over, rather than nothing at all.
It’s a bit contradictory, even at times when I don’t feel like skating, it still remains the primary thing that I am thinking about. Although I may choose to take a break from it for my body’s sake, my mind cannot seem to go 24 hours without thinking about it, wanting to watch it, wanting to talk about it, wanting to write about it. I may hear wheels rolling on concrete – wherever I am – a quarter of a mile away and my head will shoot up, in total dismissal of what I was doing at the moment, just to simply watch that person pass, watch them enjoy what I also enjoy, for just a moment, I feel the solidarity between me and a person that I don’t even know, only because we both enjoy riding wooden toys.
Imagine a dog catches sight of a squirrel; it watches, attentively, to its every. single. action, until, finally, the squirrel is out of sight. It’s pretty much the same thing, besides the fact that I’m not a dog, and that that human riding that skateboard isn’t a squirrel – unless it actually was, that would be an interesting story.
All this is to say that I can’t get away from it, as much as I may get angry with it, and claim that I’m over it, and may pretend that I’m done with it – times when I may catch a shinner, or get a ticket for it, or rip a hole in yet another pair of socks – I will never actually be over it. I can’t be. When I first started, my life changed forever, for the better. It feels like skating is really all there is, and that’s all fine and dandy with me, because that’s all I really want to be around anyway, and I wouldn’t want to have it any other way.